Sunday, May 25, 2008

still more thoughts ...

It is depressing and sad to hear news these days: the increasing number of death, the number of missing ... In order to make it less depressing, I think, many news channels put in one or two "touching" stories of those being saved after 48, 72 etc. hours of the earthquake ... Honestly, I have a mixed feeling after hearing them ...

On the one hand, it is exciting and encouraging to know that more people are saved!!! They survived!! It is amazing~~ Yet, I also feel sad and sorry for these people ... for their sufferings, shorter, longer, or even for life ... It's just heartbroken having to learn what kind of suffering they have to endure. It leads me to see how much these people treasure and value their lives that they are determined in seeking survival, LIFE!! How much do I treasure my life? How much do I treasure my various relationships? Would they be significant enough for me to endure much hardships?? What a great big reflection!!

I, at times, wonder if it were to happen in a more developed country or city, would the "survival rate" (# of people saved after say 48 hours or above) be as high? I have an intuitive impression that it would be lower ... cuz having lived in abundance, convenience, and enormous choices .... we seem to forget what suffering is ... It is something we avoid instead of endure~~ We are never trained to endure hardship, we just run away from them, we give up too soon~~~ What are we teaching our next generation? Or are we simply feeding and providing for our next generation without leading them to maturity?? How about myself?? Am I trying to run away and take an easier route to avoid pains and suffering? Or do I really know what I am doing and convicted of my actions and endurance?

Ooops ... think too far ... My prayers are with Sichuan and Burma~ Sichuan and Burma hang in there~~ We are all standing by you ... It's tough, but you can do it~~ No, WE can do it, cuz you are not alone!

more thoughts ...

Hm ... a year's past~~ Do I like my birthday?? Honestly, "MY" birthday - I don't know if I really like it much ... I guess if I learn to love myself more, I probably would like it better, feeling more of a celebration .... My problem!! Though I know cerebrally for no matter how I feel, the fact is I'm fearfully and wonderfully made~~ ^.^ (challenge is to learn it from the heart~)

Thank you for all my friends who remember the day and care to send me msg or call wishing me a happy birthday~~ For sure you made the day happier, brighter and better~~ Thank you for those who celebrated my bday and those who even remember to get my favourite cake!!! (It's REALLY a surprise~~ hahaha ... think I gave you yet a bigger surprise for not recognizing it =P ... sooo embarrassing!!! but the thoughtfulness is much much appreciated~~) Thanks for those who somehow inspired me to "trap" myself to blow tea candles as bday candles!!! (still can't get over my stupidity~~ =P but it's lots of FUN~~) Thank you friends and family - without you, my life would be dull and colorless, without you, I would not be me!!

One thing I like about bday is the "excuse" to get together and catch up with old good friends. Nothing is better than catching up with friends, sharing DEEP full of laughters and even tears, and perhaps prayers ... No any present is better than your thoughtfulness, expressing in humor or sincerity, or both, and your presence, physically, audibly or electronically or however creatively. They all touch my heart deeply every year. After all, I really should learn to celebrate birthday, not because of me for I've lived one more year, but the fact that I have someoneS who filled my life with many wonderful deeds, love, laughters, and memories for another year.

Thank you my dear friends and family, each of you are a Great BIG blessing to my life~~~ THANK you!! Thank you Lord, for your fearfully and wonderfully made creations, and having put them in my life~~